Episode Guide
Episode Guide

Lipschitz Live

// K2814 · Originally aired
The gang is separated during a slide to a world where a perpetually airing tabloid-TV show offers their only hope of a reunion. Also, Colin is mistaken for his double and is betrothed to a woman as part of a bizarre corporate merger.
  • Written By // Keith Damron
  • Director // Jerry O'Connell
  • Music // Danny Lux

Reviews

// Earth Prime

With no greater ambitions than a few laughs, “Lipschitz Live” meets this low standard. If you’re capable of leaving it at that, you may enjoy this outing. If not, it’s going to annoy the heck out of you.
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// Think of a Roulette Wheel

Again, casual sexism.
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// External Reviews

Worlds Visited

Lipschitz World

Weird media conglomerations have transformed a schlock daytime television host into the most watched entertainment/news personality in the world.

Timer Status

Clearly not used to broad-based EM radiation, it copes by splitting the wormhole in thirds to maintain its integrity.

Details

  • The first portion of “Lipschitz Live” is brought to you by “Body Slam” Malt Liquor.
  • Quinn passes a realtor’s office and a floral shop on his way to the Chandler.
  • The sign inside the Chandler reads:The Chandler Welcomes
    InfiniCorp &
    Millennia Media
    TO THE
    1997 World Television
    Corporate Summit
  • Colin’s double is staying in room 412 of the Chandler Hotel.
  • Alt-Colin is reading the Sports section of USA Today.
  • The Chrysler advertisement on the back of Colin’s newspaper says “Introducing the newest member of team Monte Carlo.”
  • Articles on the Sports page include:
    • Making the points
    • Lakers subdue [rest illegible]
  • “Lipschitz Live” is broadcast from KKRP.
  • The license plate on MacArthur Mallory’s limo reads MILMEDIA.
  • Infinicorp and Millennium Media have been at war for over 50 years.
  • “Lipschitz Live” is taped at SC24, and guests enter through the artist’s entrance.
  • The Hilton runs an airport shuttle every 30 minutes.
  • Copies of Lipschitz: Too Hot for TV can be purchased for only $19.95.

Cultural References

  • KKRP is the west-of-the-Mississippi equivalent of WKRP in Cincinnati, a show that staff writer Chris Black used to write for.
  • “The Senator, while denying he was drunk, could not explain his nudity” is part of the opening sequence of “WKRP.”

The Rise of Barry Lipschitz

  • Barry Lipschitz got his name as a reporter for INN network during the war with Guam.
  • INN merged with TBC after the war.
  • Global bought TBC and then later merged with UNIMAX.
  • All of this was folded into the Turnbull Group.
  • General Comco swallowed up the Turnbull Group.
  • The Unabomer bought all of this, and since he liked Lipschitz so much, put him on all of the networks.

Topics on Lipschitz Live

  • Head Implants—Proof of alien abduction or dental malpractice?
  • A man claiming he’s the reincarnation of Nostradamus, but insists he doesn’t remember making any prophecies.
  • A weeklong look at the paranormal.
  • The dog who predicted the Los Angeles earthquake and the results of last year’s Rose Bowl.
  • The Bowling Ball Freeway maniac strikes again! This time on the Richard Nixon Freeway in Yorba Linda!
  • Cletus Shepard—world record holder for being buried alive in a 6 by 4 box.
  • A 10-year-old Webelo scout in Ashland, Kentucky is actually a clone!
  • Another Batboy found on Long Island!
  • Dwayne the cross-dressing fisherman!
  • Space aliens, interdimensional travelers—are they among us?
  • A panel of reviewers discuss the controversial book: “Satan: What’s the Big Deal?”
  • Flying chairs!
  • Transvestite cats!
  • On-stage shootouts!
  • Sex change operations performed before a live studio audience!

On Mergers and Acquisitions

  • The bride and the groom are both the representatives of major corporations. Each is dressed in traditional wedding attire, and members of each corporation are seated in pews behind them.
  • There is no justice of the peace. Instead, of the major heads of the corporations holds the ledger that both the bride and groom must sign. Upon signing it, they are pronounced man and wife.
  • Exiting the chapel, members of both corporations raise their briefcases above their heads, forming a canopy to walk under.
  • The wedding isn’t quite over, yet. The merger must be consummated with two witnesses present. When that’s done, the wedding is considered final.

Character Information

  • Colin’s double has a ton of monogrammed clothing and eats Chinese food.
  • Colin’s parents left him a two-room cabin, four cows and some chickens.
  • Colin misses his father.
  • Big surprise: Colin’s a virgin.

Notable Quotes

  • “Somehow, this has to be Quinn’s fault.”—Maggie, on finding themselves forty stories up… literally.
  • “‘Cuz you’re the man, act like one!”—Maggie, to Rembrandt. Huh? That came from Maggie?
  • “Maggie, I’m looking at freaking seagulls up here, he can’t hear you!”—Rembrandt.
  • “That’s the trouble with you kids today. You read too damn much. You don’t watch enough television.”—Hal the barkeep, to Quinn.
  • “Your clicker is definitely bigger than my clicker.”—Quinn, after seeing the monolith that Hal uses to change channels.
  • “Just how good of a friend of mine are you, toots?”—Alt-Colin to Maggie, who slaps him a few seconds later.
  • “Hey baby, I’m still a little groggy. You wanna help me on with those pants?”—Alt-Colin, acting a little like a pig.
  • “Since cable died, there’s no market for shows about scientific whiz kids who live in their parent’s basement and have no life!”—Lipschitz producer. If you don’t get it, you’re watching the wrong show.
  • “Did you have sex with her?”—the producer, after Quinn tells her about Logan St. Claire.
  • “Look at him, he doesn’t even have an outfit!”—Astral chaneler Arnold Potts, mocking Quinn’s regular wardrobe.
  • “I’ll give you baby cakes!”—Maggie, slapping Alt-Colin, which prompts him to respond, “That’s a feisty broad!”
  • “You call that a timer? You call that a timer?! That’s a timer!”—Arnold, making fun of Quinn’s timer.
  • “I think we’ll buy that channel that shows nothing but science fiction programming!”—Colin. Um, he sure isn’t talking about the Sci-Fi Channel.
  • “No, no, no. I don’t take cabs. We’ll buy another limo.”—MacArthur Mallory.
  • “Those crazy Sliders, I tell you!”—Hal the barkeep, after watching the vortex open and close on national television.

Money Matters

  • Quinn charges a beer and a lobster dinner to Millennium Media.
  • Maggie and Rembrandt skip out on the hospital bill for Alt-Colin.
  • Colin buys KKRP with his double’s money.

Nitpicks and Errors

  • How come Rembrandt remembers when Quinn was separated from them in Gillian of the Spirits but not being totally separated from Quinn and the Professor for days during Summer of Love?
  • If they’re going to name the hotel concierge Gomez Calhoun, why not hire William Sasso, who originated the role? He works in Los Angeles now on “Mad TV.”
  • What are the odds that Colin’s stepfather would also have the last name Mallory?
  • The goggles that Arnold Potts wears on “Lipschitz Live” are also the VR goggles seen in Virtual Slide, which incidentally is the other episode written by Keith Damron this season.
  • Why is the hospital that they take Colin to labeled Van Nuys Hospital like it was in Asylum? How difficult is it to re-label a piece of glass?
  • I’ll leave it up to you to decide how a local station like KKRP is still producing the number one television show in the world, let alone how “Lipschitz Live” stays on the air all day.
  • Are Rembrandt and Maggie really that dense?
  • Why would the United States pick a fight with Guam? On Earth Prime, Guam is a territory of the U.S.

Neatpicks

  • Quinn’s discussion about transporting everyone to another world on “Lipschitz Live” recounts events seen in World Killer.
  • The WKRP references are noted below.
  • The name of Lipschitz, played by Charlie Brill, originated on “Silk Stalkings,” also starring Charlie Brill and executive produced by David Peckinpah. Intentional? You betcha.

Guest Starring

  1. Israel Juarbe also plays Gomez Calhoun in Roads Taken and To Catch a Slider.
  2. Scott Kloes reprises his role as Hal the Bartender in The Unstuck Man, and plays a man in Asylum.

Script Archive

Click on the links below to download rare scripts, outlines, and memos associated with this episode.

January 8, 1998
1st Pink Revisions

January 30, 1998
2nd Blue Revisions

Related Articles

All in the Family
TV Zone #103

The Inside Slide

Charlie O’Connell enjoyed his double take as a double of Colin Mallory.

“I had an episode which was like an Italian thing, and I was wearing the gold chains—the whole thing,” he explains. “It’s fun that every once in a while they throw in another character that you can do completely differently.”

· · ·

It may have been fun, but the addition of a Colin double to the series undermined an important element to the Kromagg arc—that initially Colin was to be a Kromagg plant working to get the Sliders to Kromagg Prime.

Episodes like The Alternateville Horror set up elements that would reveal Colin to be a cloned variant of Quinn (the clone grown after samples were taken in Invasion; however, a double dislodged that idea and the idea fell out of favor.

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